Happy half birthday to me! As of today I’m officially 6 months into being 27. That said, I’ve been reflecting a lot lately, on who I am, what I’ve accomplished, and how I see my future.
Before this year, thinking on this would’ve given me such anxiety and stress that I would’ve completely avoided the thought at all; living with my head in the sand, floating along, was usually the better option. Before I moved into the city, I used to satiate that feeling of not knowing what I wanted by spending my free time driving around. Once here, I took to walking everywhere instead, then biking (once I could afford a bike) pretty much everywhere I could reach. I think all people do this sort of wandering through life; sometimes in a bottle, sometimes in other people. I just happened to do it in the literal sense.
I know age is just a number, but this is the first year I’ve experienced where I’m able to say with pride, I like the person I am, and who I’m becoming. I finally feel like a girl in control of herself. I may have faked it till I made it here (I think I’m gonna do a post on how to do this), but y’all, the last 6 months have seen some growth:
- I booked a solo trip for the first time. Like solo solo, not meeting-someone-on-the-other-end solo.
- I live by myself for the first time, and my place isn’t the size of a closet.
- I’ve gone 2 months without having a drink! I never had a “problem” with drinking, but I feel productive without all the hangovers, so I plan to keep going for now.
- I am mentally the strongest I’ve been. I’m not sure how that happened, but mental peace makes it easier to put everything else into perspective (especially in letting go of unimportant things).
- I’ve finally found some spark of drive in myself, and I hope I can grow it into an inferno.
I’m going to treat this half year mark as a time to make goals for where I hope the rest of this year takes me:
- I hope to maintain a fitness regime for at least a month straight (more might be pushing it, but after a month it’s habit, right???).
- I want to make a concentrated effort to judge others less. Everyone’s trying to find their own path at their own pace, who am I to comment?
- I hope I take at least one more big trip! Or at least have one planned.
- Start really focusing on building my blog into the business I think it can be.
I may not physically be where I would like to be, but I’ve learned to enjoy the process. Life is a learning experience, and you can only find yourself if you are moving forward in some sense, physically or mentally. And don’t get me wrong, I feel more like a matryoshka doll than anything. There’s definitely still an angry young adult inside me who shouts at people on the streets for being crude, the teenager always flighty like that first time I tasted freedom in my own car (I still bomb hills on my bike for that thrill), and that child caught deer-in-headlights in wonder at life. I love all those layers.